…Challenge them

Posted on April 30, 2008

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This is a discussion seed I wrote for Blogathon India. The topic of discussion was:

What are the challenges that society faces in accepting the concept of alternate sexuality? How can we address them?”

I say, Challenge them.

The society doesn’t face challenges – they create them and impose them on each other. What is alternate sexuality? What is sexuality? Sexual habits, preferences, etc. are to be called sexuality. So what is alternate and what is not alternate? Everything that most people do is regular and whenever somebody don’t do what most people do it becomes irregular or alternate or unnatural.

Why do most people do a certain thing? Because, to repeat myself, most people have been doing that thing. It’s a vicious circle meticulously thought and created by mankind at the start of civilization. As homosapiens started becoming civilized they imposed all kinds of norms on each other so that they could gain control over property and generally gain control.

You see, an urge to control others comes naturally to certain human beings. When a few of them get together they simply bake ways to control the world at large, giving it a start by controlling the nearest set of people. Just for the heck of it, there is no good reason why they should control they simply feel the need to control.

Also, a few of them also had some God sent message, some sudden enlightenment about how they must ensure everything in the world was alright, so they started preaching things they thought was best for all of us. Who said it was best that is not the point – God sent.

So they thought of many concepts, right-wrong, good-bad, natural-unnatural. Few people made the concepts, and the rest were asked to follow. If they didn’t follow they were being shamed, looked down upon, punished, etc. But even otherwise, the problem with human beings is that like controlling comes naturally to some, being controlled and bullied also comes naturally to many of them.

So when the controller said sexual intercourse between people with similar reproductive organs is bad, the rest of them mutely agreed and conformed. If only they would have asked back then, “really but exactly why? And who are you to tell us that?” I wouldn’t be writing this article today.

But no they didn’t do that, because they were bloody chicken. (Not sure why we use this bird’s inference while talking about cowardice, a soul which is being butchered for millions of years and yet has the nerve to reproduce). Human beings also like to live a life of comfort. For them it’s best not to mess around as long as possible. Ok, they said it’s bad, we don’t tell them we are doing it.

It is very easy to keep blaming others for oppressing, but unless you question everything that is being told to, asked from, expected of you, you can’t blame others. As individuals we must always question, why and what for. We must never accept any norm just because our parents told us so or just because our religious scriptures says so.

There is no better way to overcome the challenges but to challenge them. Personally I try to talk about things no body talks about just to challenge the idea that we shouldn’t be talking about them. I use terms like sexuality, homosexuality, gay, lesbian in most of my casual conversations. I don’t lower my voice either. I talk to my parents about these issues, I talk to my cousins, hoping that if I could change at least one of these people’s attitude towards sexuality – that would be an achievement, no matter how small.

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Posted in: Feminism, Sexuality